The words that came to me in a crazy daydream moment and I had to let it out!

I'm very sorry to be like that, feel so much and write about all of this, but you know, nobody that I know read this blog so it's ok, no gossip around me in the future.

I needed to show this masterpiece of Brazilian gastronomy that I'm addicted to.

BRIGADEIRO.

My new favorite drink Gin Tonic with Lemon and Ginger!

♥

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I'm with a guy who treats me the way I've always wanted to, in fact he treats me like I never thought I'd be treated. All the experiences with him is always the first times. I feel good by him side, I laugh, it's cool, comfortable, I want him to miss me, actually I like when I see that he watched my stories on instagram and if he does not see I become paranoid, ok, I'm a little possessive girl, but I don't keep thinking all the time about it.

It seems to be out of context, but it was on a relaxing and good afternoon when we went out together, it was a pleasant and memorable day. Do you see that I am happy with a simple moment?!

It's been three months since we've been dating, there's a rule for this period that says that if it goes beyond that period, it turns into dating or nothing, obviously there are exceptions. In our case he's starting to distance himself, nothing is like the first few times, so I'm already waiting for him to finish things between us, because I won't do it first this time.

We met in High School, after 18 years we follow each other on instagram and start chatting, all about it was so simple  and easy, just happened and despite my imagination I'm okay about our relationship, by the way, it's just an affair, he does not my boyfriend and I don't feel that will be, I always wait the end, because this always happen. I'm a pessimist, I don't know, I simply feel that there's no one for me, I don't know what means stay in love with someone, the balance of the feeeling in two humans, I never felt beloved. They always treated me gentle, but you know just for the next step, yes, sex! I'll stop this monologue 'cause I'm feeling stupid.

I don't know how act with the guys, what the game they play in a romance, I barelly know when they are playing.

So I look in the mirror and out of nowhere I think of that guy, he's still a sharp thin line of heartache, pain of rejection and everything we've talked about and demonstrated to each other in the past. I pray the pain will end, I need to keep going, but this pain stays in a box inside me and little sparks ignite sometimes. I need to write about us, a story, not like here in a post, but turn it all into art to finally let it go.

I forgot that I feel so happy writing here, well I'm feeling grateful for this.

This girl, ME, will make all her dreams come true!

(I know that not all my dreams will come true, but I still make this statement)

♥